RichC

I'm just a little cleavage monkey

6.28.2006

Worst travel day ever

I once worked 51 hours straight. Several times I've done more than 36, so why does airline travel suck so much life out of me?

3:40am - Wake up. Dreams of past and present employers. Think about going back to sleep. Not gonna happen
3:58am - Turn on TV to lull myself
4:28am - Realize that I'm not gonna fall back asleep, and start packing. Since I forgot to pack pants for this trip, I'm reduced to either shivering in the over airconditioned plane, or wear same Walmart pants from yesterday.
4:29am - Put on pants
4:48am - Realize in car on way to airport that Starbucks doesn't open until 5:30. Fuel up rental and pass on the gas station coffee. Mistake.
6:15am - Hope to catch the 6:40 flight, too late so I get stand by for the 7:40 and confirmed on the 9:40. Grab a smoke 5 hours earlier than I normally do. Good idea.
7:40am - plane full.
8:00am - I'm #2 on the stand-by list.
8:20am - Ticketed. Gate Agent apologizes that it's not a great seat, but I don't care, it's only a 2 hour flight.
8:40am - All aboard, but we're not going anywhere.
9:10am - Captian comes on and explains that they're having hydraulic issues. "Since it affects the taking off, flying and landing part of this flight, we need to get it checked out."
9:45am - Apology
10:30am - Apology about the lack of air
11:00am - Single serve cups of water are doled out. It's 95 here in Dallas and the plane is every bit as hot inside.
11:30am - status quo
11:45am - aploogies
12:30pm - disembark plane for alternate plane at different gate
12:38pm - board lovely Dallas train (they cringe if you say tram.)
1:12pm - board plane #2
1:32PM - All aboard, here we go finally.
1:47pm - Maintence crew arrives on board. This is not a good sign.
2:12pm - Captain explains that this planbe also is having techincal difficulties.
2:13pm - collective groan from all passengers.
2:38pm - Captain steps out of cockpit, gets on intercom and looking the passengersin the face explains that the altimeter is having issues and as much as it pains him (and he did look stressed,) he will not fly this plane with these mechanivcal problems.
2:45pm - leave plane # 2 and go back to the gate where original flight was at. Yes the same plane.
3:15pm - all passengers finally recieve meal vouchers. Whoopee.
3:42pm - board plane #3 or #1 depending on how your scoring.
4:10pm - Flight attendant gets on intercom and explains that if we're not airborne by 4:30, they will be in violation of their hours and will have to change out the crew.
4:18pm - everybody is in their seats, and all luggage is stowed.
4:26pm - airborne

4:37pm - PIlot gets on intercom and explains that since you can see Oklahoma off the left side of the plane, we are indeed on our way to Chicago.
6:30pm - touchdown
7:40pm - home

now all I have to do is get up at 4am for my flight tomorrow.

7 Comments:

  • At 1:17 PM, Blogger Ubermilf said…

    Um, I love you?

     
  • At 1:20 PM, Blogger Fella said…

    hell, after that day I'll say I love you. You poor bastard.

     
  • At 6:03 PM, Blogger UberDILF said…

    thanks both.

     
  • At 1:55 AM, Blogger yournamehere said…

    I've found that the shorter the flight, the more problems you'll have getting airborne. I used to have to take a forty-minute flight from Vegas to Phoenix for work, and it would inevitably take four hours altogether.

     
  • At 12:55 PM, Blogger Captain Beefheart said…

    Air travel is about as unpleasant as it can be without actually being strapped to the wheels. Maybe we should all just learn to live in one place and stay there (whenever we figure out where the hell we want to be)

    Poor, poor bastard

     
  • At 1:20 PM, Blogger UberDILF said…

    Thing is, I don't mind the travel, it's just when it's bad, it's really bad.

     
  • At 4:08 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    I get the not packing pants. It happens; but, how is the only option freezing or wearing newly-purchased Wal-Mart pants? What I'm getting at is my suspiscion that you forgot your pants period... How'd you get through airport security like that?

     

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