I'm just a little cleavage monkey


Weddings & Urban Living

If you know a guy who has had a tuxedo since his early twenties, even though he was making shit for money then, you know a guy who worked in the wedding business. Photographers, videographers, musicians & waiters all would work like 12-14 hour days on Saturday and Sunday all gussied up in a monkey suit doing manual labor. OK, it isn't all manual labor, but a lot of equipment gets moved in and out. It can get old real quick.

Part of what burned me out, was the dichotomy between this huge milestone in the clients lives, and just another shitty day at work for me. They're walking around with Rose colored glasses (or worse yet Bridezilla's mother complaining about every little detail,) hoping the night will never end. I was just waiting for all the groomsmen to take off their jackets so I could do the same.

Tourists remind me of party guests. They are a necessary component of this greater machine (tourist dollars fund a lot of programs.) Sometimes they are really polite and make me want to help them out (going the wrong way up the El stairs, or standing around trying to figure out where a good pizza joint is.) Other-times I am the callous urbanite telling them to get out of the way (standing in the middle of the sidewalk outside the train station @ 5:20 pm trying to take a picture while the locals are just trying to get home.)

I can empathize, this is a big day for you. You've probably spent a fair amount of time and money to get here, but I live here, and it's hot, and I'm tired. So for the love of God, please just relax, take off your jacket and go with the flow.